Friday, December 31, 2010

Figuratively Speaking

A couple of days ago my mind wandered off somewhere it shouldn’t but it seems to do that a lot these days. While it was off on its little junket, it kept singing Doll Parts by Hole. The line “I want to be the girl with the most cake” from the chorus really stuck.

girl_most_cake_smIt stuck so tenaciously, I felt compelled to make a collage. The song is sad, tragic, and I can certainly identify with her words. So while the song is full of pain, I can see a positive spin on the refrain. Being the girl with the most cake doesn’t have to be what Love meant. It can be anything I want it to be. I like the collage so much, I think I’m going to do another version on canvas to hang in my bathroom. That’s a damn good motivator to see first thing in the morning. For me anyway.

I posted a picture of the collage on my Facebook page. My ex-boyfriend latched onto the cake part. I brought him some donuts recently. He tried to give me one and I declined. He thought I was trying to be good – as in not eating junk. I’m getting quite chunky and I’m diabetic. Then some crusty sugar fell out of the folds of my cowled blouse. Busted! He left a comment about keeping the crumbs out of my clothing. I had to laugh, partly because of the donut incident and partly because didn’t realize the cake is metaphoric. He’s not exactly a fan of Hole so he gets a pass on that one.

Then the idea of actual cake got my brain to snickering. I made another collage on the same bent but with a different message. I think I’m going to put this one on the fridge. Oh wait, there’s never any food in there. And certainly no cake. I’m safe at home, it’s at work I have to worry about. We have donuts.

Monday, December 27, 2010

A New Planner with a Purpose

I’ve spent a lot of time lately trying to get my life back on track and headed in the direction I want to go. One of the things I’ve focused on and think I’ve been doing pretty well on is being happy. Sounds like a no-brainer, right? Things are seldom as easy as they sound. I’ve always said being happy is a choice. Now I choose to live by my own words.

The other thing I’ve tried to work on is mindfulness. Yeah, another thing that sounds much simpler than it is. How often do we find ourselves going about our business not really paying attention or being “in the moment.” If you’re like most people, the answer is probably often. I joke that my ADD makes me too aware – it allows me to be distracted by every new shiny thought or . . Squirrel! . . what was I saying? I’m guilty of not paying full attention to what I am doing while I’m doing it. It may require a Herculean effort on my part to accomplish this but I’m giving it a shot. At this point in my life, I’d be happy with being mindful 50% of the time as it would be a vast improvement over where I am now.

I walked to my local Borders bookstore to buy a 2011 planner. I hated 99% of the ones I found. I finally found one that would work. It wasn’t anywhere near perfect but it was a close as I was going to get. I didn’t care for the cover and it was plastic-y so I wondered how I was going to recover it. It was also $17.99. I had a 40% off coupon but even so, I thought it was still overpriced. I wandered over to the clearance area (my own version of Kryptonite) to give it once over before checking out. There sat some fat little sketchbooks at rock bottom prices. I checked out the paper and decided they kind of sucked as a sketchbook, the paper is way too thin and slick. But – they would make awesome planners! I bought the 8”x8” and the 6”x6” because I couldn’t make up my mind which one I wanted to use. Later, I decided on the 8x8.


This is the sketchbook. The photo doesn’t quite capture the nonconducive to creativity color of the cover. It’s somewhere between ‘70’s Harvest Gold and the contents of a newborn’s diaper. Either way – ewwww. I sectioned the pages into groups for each month and a few extra sections I needed.


I made tabs for the months and the extra sections. I ran the tabs through the Xyron with the laminating/permanent adhesive cartridge in. I was rather whimsical in naming the extra sections. Evil Plans is stuff I really, really, need to pay attention to and work on. There’s also “Abracadabra” and “Hocus Pocus.”


Since the book is blank, I have to draw in everything. I like this idea better than using the standard planners. If I have to draw in the lines and write all the information myself, I will be more mindful of what I’m doing – while I’m doing it. Wow. Why didn’t I think of this sooner? Maybe it’s because . . Squirrel! . What was I saying?


Each month on the page before the month-at-a-glance view, I picked a theme for that month. January is Face. I’ve neglected taking care of my skin. It’s more than that though, the face I show the world. I often go around looking like I live under a bridge. This is not the image I want to project!


February is Love, not romantic love, it’s surrounding myself with the things I love. Adding and making time for enjoyable things with mindfulness to every day life boosts that happy factor big time. I stopped doing a lot of stuff I love because I felt other people in my life didn’t like it. Not anymore!


March is Body. Yeah, I’ve become fluffier than I’d like. I can’t squeeze my pudgy butt into half the clothes in my closet! The main thing is not my size, it’s my health. I’m diabetic and I feel better when I take care of myself. Eating healthy and exercising makes me feel better.


April (I forgot to put the word April on the page!) is Soul. I have strayed so far from where I used to be in this regard. I won’t bore you with my religion or philosophy. April’s focus will be feeding my soul and reconnecting. Since my sincere belief is that all things are connected, I suppose I never really left.


I’m not finished with the cover yet. It will be a collage of all sorts of wacky stuff that makes me happy. If the cover speaks to me, it will only add to the desire to pick it up and use it. Everyday. Mindfully. This just may turn out to be the best planner I’ve ever had.

I did start on the page for May but I didn’t take a photo yet. I don’t think I’ll go any further than that for now. One thing I was sure of is that I didn’t want to pick a theme for every month just yet. Life is on the fly, things change. I want to make sure I leave room for change, the endless possibilities that may be just around the corner. I felt like picking something now for say, August, would be like setting it in stone and who knows what might happen in June? Maybe it would alter my whole focus of where I am where I want to go. I welcome all possibilities.